Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Goodbye Starbucks. Goodbye cupcakes.

I flip-flopped back and forth on whether or not I would even write this post.

1. How do you write nothing for months, and then just reappear? And with drama.
2. I hate sympathy posts. And complainers. And other people's health problems.

For several years, I have suffered from some seemingly random symptoms. Chest pain with no known heart abnormalities. Severe abdominal pain. Bouts of insomnia. Numb hands and feet. Fatigue. Achy joints. The list goes on. I have seen many doctors. Each one eventually determining I was depressed or anxious. Not one offering any solution other than anti-depressants.

When a blood vessel in my eye burst a few months ago, my opthamalogist became concerned. She pieced together some of my other symptoms and suggested I see a Rheumatologist. I made my appointment, and then braced myself for a diagnosis of Rheumatoid Arthritis.

I was completely thrown off when my doctor told me that I did not, in fact, have RA. Instead, I have a rare genetic condition that is also an inflammatory auto-immune disorder. Except, I get the added fun of organ failure. Predominantly kidney failure, followed by liver failure. Yay.

There is no cure, and it is progressive. The really good news is there is a known treatment that will significantly reduce my chances of kidney and liver failure. The downside is I will have to take this for the rest of my life. And there are some serious side effects. The biggest is it speeds up your digestive system (read: diarrhea. ew.) AND blocks absorption of some vitamins and minerals. Almost all patients have severe weight loss. I am a size four. I doubt I need any severe weight loss. Especially given the worst part.

I will have to give up dairy while taking this medication. No Starbucks white chocolate mochas. No cupcakes with milk every evening. This, my friends, is the part that makes me tear up. You want me to give up cupcakes? Forever? And while I can eat as much as I want and still be skinny?

The results of my liver function test should be in by Tuesday, which means I should start on a low dose of my medication by Wednesday. I have to be dairy free three days prior to my first dose. That gives me through Sunday.

Don't worry friends, I started two-a-days in preparation. White mochas in the morning. Peppermint lattes in the afternoon.


Lil' Woman said...

I'm so sorry hun...I hope everything will work itself out for you but no cupcakes.....sadface.

Kristina said...

This definitely counts as getting the short end of the straw. I'm glad there is a silver lining in that there is a medication that can help you and that you were able to indulge in Starbucks and Cupcakes fully before they were sadly taken from you so harshly!

Allison said...

They so make this stuff vegan. No worries friend. I can help you out w the cupcakes and lattes. Hopefully you are going to get it under control

Gin said...

Holy shit, girl.
This sounds like a big ball of Suck - I'm sorry you will be giving up your sweets, not to mention dealing with you know, sucky health issues, but I'm glad there seems to be a good course of treatment for you. Sending good vibes your way!

I am Trish Marie said...

Allison, lucky for me my mom eats a pretty strict vegan diet, and happens to be a sweet addict like me! She has perfected vegan brownies and such!

I don't really want to drink soy milk, and I am just not sure white mochas with almond milk are the same!

Clemson Girl said...

That sound heartbreaking but you sound like a strong woman. Good luck with everything!

Aimee' said...

Oh my goodness...I had no idea. I'm so sorry to hear this!! What is the diagnosis? I'm waaaay behind on reading blogs since I started teaching! and FYI - the word verification is "colen" no jokes...