Friday, October 16, 2009

Grass Emergencies

I have always managed the billing and scheduling for our landscaping company. But since recently becoming unemployed, Kenny decided I should take on a few more duties. Like answering the phone calls. You know, for all the grass emergencies.

Most of our clients are great. Our commercial clients never even bother to call. They fax in work orders, and I do nothing more than schedule the service for the appropriate crew. I never even have to talk to anyone. Awesome. The residential clients? Oh Lord. They call for everything under the sun. Some just to tell me they mailed their payment. Great. I'll figure that out when I receive it. Some to tell me to schedule extra services. Score! Extra money! And some? Because well, they have a landscaping emergency. Like a blade of grass out of place. Or a rogue weed. Or oh my God Santiago mowed in a circular path instead of straight lines! For real.

We have this one customer. Let's call her Sally, because, well, that's her name. Let's also hope Sally doesn't read this here blog. If so, Hi Sally, I swear I am saying all of this with love. Anyway, Sally calls me, I kid you not, at least three times a day. We mow her yard once a week. That is fifteen phone calls per mow. At first, I thought Sally might be a bit lonely, so I humored her and talked to her. Then, I decided Sally is actually crazy. But crazy still pays the bills, apparently. Yesterday, Sally called to tell me we should not mow, because it had rained. A few days ago. Fine. Then she called back to tell me we should mow on a later day. I scheduled it for another day, just like she asked. Then she called to ask me to trim her hedges and the hedges at her daughter's house. Then she called to tell me not to trim her hedges, just to trim the hedges at her daughter's house. Whew. Done.

Today, she called to tell me they were getting a new company, since we did not show up to mow.

Um. Okay.

Do you think this means she will really quit calling me, or do you think she will call me next week and wonder why we didn't show up?


Kristina said...

Just imagine what the poor receptionist at her doctor's office must feel like!

Allison Talamantez said...

I think you should tell Sally she should mow her own yard instead of calling you with all of her free time.

Aimee' said...

Sally sounds like this old lady that used to call me in the middle of the night when I was a dispatcher for an ambulance company...she'd call from the HOSPITAL to tell me her nurses weren't taking care of her...umm really?! Press the call button and call your nurses because I don't give a damn!