Jillian possesses the uncanny ability to talk for three hours straight WITHOUT TAKING ONE BREATH. The word assault I must endure daily would drive anyone crazy. In compensation, I have the uncanny ability to look like I am listening, respond to you, and never actually hear a word you say. My talent, however, is not as great as Jill's. Sometimes, she outdoes me. I have to run. Run far, far away. Or go to the corner, cover my ears, and cry.
Word for word, here is this morning's word vomit.
"Mommy, mommy. Watch what I am doing. Look, look see. I have my foot on here, and I am like 'whoa, whoa, WHOAAAA.' Then I take my foot down, and I play PE by running around the kitchen. Watch Mommy. Watch me run around the kitchen. Now I am doing sit-ups. One. Two. Three. Okay I am bored of sit-ups. I am going to have a party now. I am making cupcakes. Want one? Try one. They are good. They are bluebunnybubbleberry. Mmmmmm. Smell. I am going to put all the dolls in my room at the table. They are going to eat my.... Mommy what kind of cupcakes did I make? I can't remember what I said. Oh well. I can read that book right there. Want to hear? I know all of the words in there. My cousin, Vincent, is allergic to dust and pollen. Can I have a duster to clean all the dust out of my room, so Vincent can come over? Where is my Halloween costume? I want to look at it. The three main characters in High School Musical are Sharpay, Troy, and Gabriella. Want me to sing a song from the movie? Can I have a jelly bar? I am hungry. I don't think Sharpay knows how to swim. I know how to swim. I can hold my breath under water for a REALLY long time. Longer than anyone I know. Can we heat up the pool? I want to swim today. I have eight bathing suits. That is a lot. Good thing you like to shop Mommy. Do you know how horses drink water? Watch me drink like a horse. Neeeiiiigghhhh. I am a horse. Do horses smell funny? My favorite song from High School Musical is the one that Sharpay sings. Momma look, I can spins with my arms out. What time is it? Can I go outside? I like to ride my bike. It is hard to ride a bike in a skirt. I don't like to wear jeans. They hurt my bottom. I like skirts. They twirl. Watch me twirl. Whhhheeee. I am going to put on a skirt, so I can twirl better. One time Emmi painted the dog blue. It was funny. She fed her treats and made her sit. Then she put blue paint on her. It wasn't all over her. My friend, Allie, is going to be a cheetah for Halloween. I am a horse again. Neeeiiiggghh. Can I have straw, so I don't have to drink like a horse? Mommy. Mommy? Are you listening to me Mommy? Should I talk LOUDER, MOMMY? Mommy? Where are you going, Mommy. No Mommy, don't run away Mommy. MOOOOOMMMMY!!!"
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
4 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHA! OMG, I want to run away just reading that.
I hope this is false...for the sake of your sanity.
Soooo not false. I seriously wrote down everything she said. That is almost word for word. Except the part about me running away. That was a glorious fantansy in which I ran, screaming from the house.
Okay, I'm exhausted just from reading that! Does she get in trouble at school for excessive talking?
Post a Comment