Sunday, June 22, 2008

Dear Neighbor,

This summer has been lovely. Really it has. I love how you suggested that we trade off watching each other's children, which really meant me watching four kids every single day of the summer while you napped. I kind of get it. It is hot. We have a pool. But I like naps, too. I have put up with it, because my kids act so much better with friends over. So I have said nothing day after day. Sure. I have been irritated, but I continue to bite my tongue. And then? You seemed to notice how unbalanced it was. Victory at last, I thought. You made plans to get my kids for the day. Then? NEVER SHOWED UP. That's fine. I got over it. I even arranged a sleep over for your oldest child.

And you know, when you dropped your kid off and I said, "Is there anything I should know before she spends the night?" that would have been the appropriate time to let me know she wets the bed. I am a parent. My kids don't wet the bed, but they have their own issues. Jill still doesn't sleep through the night. Issues. I get it. And? I own mattress protectors. I can be discreet. I could have removed the dryclean only, almost brand new, satin, practically $200 bedspread off of the bed. The one that matches the other twin bed. And the custom paint on the walls. The one that is no longer sold in stores, so I can't replace it. Yeah. That one. I could have switched it with the old ones, the Strawberry Shortcakes ones that are machine washable. I could have claimed the other was dirty. I would have been nice about it. And? I wouldn't be throwing out a mattress today. Or paying out the ass for a comforter to be drycleaned. I'm just sayin'.

But Jill did want to thank you. She has been asking for a full size bed for a long time. She is over the whole bunk bed thing.

Love you to pieces,
Trish

PS If you are not too busy napping, can you watch my kids while I go mattress shopping tomorrow?

9 comments:

Catherine said...

Oh Trisha!!!! Oh my goodness!!! All I can do is giggle! Good luck mattress shopping!!!!!

Leah said...

Gotta LOVE neighbors!

rubyredruca said...

You should just be a total bitch and hand her a bill for the mattress, dry cleaning, and leave your kids with orders for them to be COMPLETE terrors. Seriously. Teach the bitch a lesson!

Hmm...is that too harsh?

Paloma said...

OMG! I would be livid and would probably have a hard time biting my tongue.

Mint Julep said...

trish, you need to start saying no. if they don't like it, too bad.

~Holly~ said...

This is funny...haha!

Erin and Liann said...

Tell the bitch to step up... That is BS!! Good luck mattress shopping!!

Lee

Allie Bear said...

I think she deserves a roundhouse kick to the face...I'm just sayin'.

SGM said...

You know--that's the thing. If she would have told you about it up front, it would have been no big deal. Once again, your neighbors suck ass.