Friday, June 13, 2008

A little flashing will go a long way.

My high school reunion is two weeks from tomorrow. I can't believe how long it has been since I graduated high school. Really. It doesn't feel like that long ago. Aside from the college, marriage, divorce, two kids, relationship with Kenny, and all that other stuff I squeezed in during those years. Basically, it kind of just feels like yesterday.

I was one of those people who loved high school. I have fond memories of it. I was happy with my place in that world. There are moments that are still talked about to this day. Like for instance, being pulled over while changing clothes in my car. Or my friend driving my jeep off a small cliff and the hilarity that ensued afterward. Or the cat nip incident. Or perhaps some of our junior/senior war antics. And without further ado....

Excuse me ma'am, license, registration, and oh my God are those your boobs?

In my Senior year of high school, I talked my dad into buying me a brand new Jeep. Mostly cause he wanted one of his own. It was Gunmetal Blue. I immediately set to work adding a lift and tires and a kickass sound system. My friends and I drove that Jeep everywhere.

Especially back and forth to Conroe, where our friend, Nathan, had moved. His family lived on the golf course, backing up to Walden Country Club. We spent countless weekends "fishing for golfers," a game his father, of all people, invented by attaching a golf ball to a fishing pole. We'd sit on their deck, hidden by the thick trees, with the golf ball strategically placed on the green. As the golfers would mistakenly reach for the ball, we would reel it in, giggling hysterically. Sometimes, we ran for our lives as our joke was not always received well. When the game lost it's appeal, we would hang out at the country club or ride the wave runners on the lake, always heading home at precisely 11:15 to make the forty-five minute drive in time.

Often Nathan would follow us, not comfortable with two girls driving those roads alone on the back country roads, until we hit the main road. The temperature was always so much colder at night on those roads. We generally brought jackets along with us for the ride home. Instead, one night I had a change of clothes. But, we were late leaving the restaurant, and I hadn't had time to change. As soon as the headlights disappeared behind us, I ripped my shirt off, preparing to change into my warmer shirt. Before I could get the other shirt over my head, the headlights reappeared behind us. We dissolved into giggles. "Shit! What the hell. I thought he turned around already!" My friend laughed and suggested I speed up. "Lose him." I down shifted, increasing my speed up to almost 60 miles per hour on the 40 mile per hour country road. Almost instantly, red and blue lights filled the darkness.

It wasn't Nathan behind us.

I didn't know what to do. It was very dark on the road. I didn't want the officer to see my movements, and think I threatening him in anyway. I had just sped up incredibly with him right behind me. But? I still had no shirt on. My friend was no help. She couldn't even catch her breath she was laughing so hard. I was panicking. Crap, crap, crap.

The officer approached the car with his head down. "License and insurance, please ma'am."

I slowly reached over, and retrieved my ID and my insurance card, handing them over to the officer. Topless. He takes them looking up for the first time. I smiled. From the passenger seat, laughter and snorting broke the silence.

Some people insist that flirting with an officer will get you out of ticket. So apparently will flashing him.

I did manage to put my shirt on before I drove off with my warning.


Catherine said...

That was great Tricia...thanks for the laugh!

Erin and Liann said...

BWAHAHA!!! Awesome... Simply awesome!!!


That Chick Over There said...


David said...

Funny story, but the "fishing" story had me in fricking stitches!
Nice post

~Holly~ said...

I think you should definitely tell the jeep driving off the cliff story next. That was hilarious (maybe not at the time though). Who was with us? Nathan?

I am Trish Marie said...

Ha! I alreay wrote the cliff story!! It is coming!!!