I forgot that earlier in the week, I sort of made plans with one of my friends. I more or less invited her to tag along for something I was already needing to do. Except, as the week went on, I had too much to do, and I was going to put off that errand until next week. But I felt bad. I am constantly putting my friends off for work or the kids, so I decided to rearrange my schedule so I could do it.
I woke up early this morning, squeezing in two hours of work before taking Jill to get her passport. Then I dropped Jill at her friends, and quickly grabbed lunch for Emmi and I. I figured at best, I had another thirty minutes to work before we would leave again. I really had other things I needed to do while Jill was gone. I am hosting a baby shower in a few weeks, and I need to get started on some of the small projects for that. But, no. I wasn't going to cancel. As I sat working, I remembered that I needed to get something for my reunion. Damn. I could be doing that this afternoon. No. No. No. I will not cancel. I just kept thinking about how easy it would be to get some of these things checked off my to-do list while Jill is at the movies with her friend. Shopping with one kid is so much easier than two. But. I couldn't cancel.
Except. She was supposed to be here an hour ago, and she isn't even answering my calls. And now Jill will be home soon. I could have squeezed in one or two of my other, more pressing errands. Instead. I got NOTHING done. Not even this less important trip. Because I sat here fucking waiting. And? This is not the first time she has done this. This happens every time. And you know what? I am not even mad at her. I am mad at myself for being stupid enough to rearrange my schedule.