I decided why it is that I like to scrapbook.
See the thing is, I like art. All art. Serious art. Painting mostly. If you have been to my house, you know that my living room has ever changing canvas of my own artwork. Sometimes completely original. Sometimes a look I have copied. It depends on my mood. I change it every few months. My children's rooms and game room also hold original artworks. The walls themselves are also works of my art. My six-year-old has requested that I not change any more rooms while she is out of town. Apparently this has become a bad habit of mine. She goes out of town for a week to see her dad, I completely redesign a room in my free time. She says it is little unnerving to come home and find her home completely different than the way she left it. She actually used the word "unnerving." It is a problem. I admit it.
Room renovations generally begin, you know, like the week before Emmi's first major surgery. So I am well aware that I use it as distraction. Not even so much as a distraction, as a tool to completely shut my mind down. The constant inner monologue of what-ifs and worries and fears completely melts away, and all that is left is "steady hand, straight line, curve to the left, a little more brown, a touch of red." It is impossible for the two to co-exist in my brain. So for a little while I get some peace. Even if, you know, my family comes home to a different color living room every night of the week. I imagine they feel a bit like Alice in Wonderland. Except the size of their surroundings doesn't change. Just the color and pattern.
A few months ago my computer crashed. I recovered and printed all 2000+ photos that were stored on it. Then a few weeks ago, the other computer started having problems charging. It also has many photos. We have been uploading them to snapfish, and gradually printing them. Remember the days of actually owning and looking at your photos? I wondered what to do with all of those photos. It was confusing. What does one do with photos besides email them and post them on blogs? I started organizing them in order in photo albums. That task alone took a week. Then it occurred to me that it would be fun to make a scrapbook for each child. I am crafty. I always meant to do it. I actually have the pictures now. Why not? I mentioned it to my parents, my birthday was a few days away, and next thing you know, I am the proud of owner of a fancy pants cutter machiney thing! JOY! So I started scrap booking. And I discovered that like painting, my brain shuts off. All I hear is, "Hmmmm....I could put a little tree there, and change the font here, and then use orange paper for the background there." And? The best part? My poor child won't have to be tormented by nightmares of ever changing walls.