Thursday, March 13, 2008

Broken Ass Shit.

I live in a fancy pants gated community. Okay, I lie. It isn't fancy pants. Just gated.

AND THE DAMN GATE IS BROKEN AGAIN.

This morning, the buses had to come in the exit gate. The high schoolers never got picked up. The jr. high and elementary school kids were late to school. I had to bring Emmi to the front of the neighborhood to meet her bus. NO ONE CAN GET IN. You can only get out.

So I called our management company. Four times. Over three hours. And the gate is still closed. And still no one can come in.

Did I mention the house next door to me burned down four years ago, and they still haven't done shit about it? That's how they do things around here.

So I called for, like, the nine-hundredth time this morning about the gate, and demanded to actually speak to Jenn, the girl at the management company that is in charge of our neighborhood. The conversation went something like this.

"Hey there Jenn, it's Tricia. I left you, like NINE HUNDRED voice mails about the gate being stuck shut. THE ONE GOD DAMN ENTRANCE GATE we have to this neighborhood. I know that you specialize in sitting at your desk with your thumb stuck up your ass, so if you could give me the number to gate company I will just go ahead and do your job for you and call them to get the gate opened. After that, I will also go ahead and write up some notices for my neighbor who has the weeds in his flowerbed that are taller than his house, and then I will just get started rebuilding this burned down house. Also, I am having my house painted next week to the SAME DAMN COLOR it already is. Just a little touch up. I know you will not bother to correct any other problems in the neighborhood, but you will find the time to send me a notice about my lack of approval for said house painting, just as you did when I repainted my front door. So let's consider this fair warning. Okay now? I'll let you get back to twiddling your thumbs now. Bye."

I kid you not. I actually said "thumb up your ass" and "twiddling your thumbs" in the conversation. Really, is it any wonder that the gate is still stuck two hours later?

4 comments:

Sheri said...

I really queston what these HOA companies do. I mean, we pay so much money every year, and this crap is going on. Yet, you do something to up the poperty value, like actually keeping up on painting, and you get in trouble. IDIOTS!

Allie said...

Is it fixed yet? or are we going to get a post tomorrow about how you kicked someone's ass or ripped the damn gate down?
I think that would be funny and would love to hear about it, you should do it even if it is fixed. It's great blog material.

Tricia said...

It was fixed about an hour later. And by fixed, I mean, they came and hauled it open. In about a week or two, I am sure someone will attempt to fix it. But don't worry, they won't bother to repaint where they fixed it. They will leave it the lovely welded color.

Colorful & Hip Photography by Billie said...

OMG, you have me tears laughing! I truly love your "bluntness", it's great to run across someone as blunt as me!

Well, I'm glad the gate is now pushed to the side - sounds like they need new management!