On our street we have four second graders. Three girls. One boy. The boy pretty much sticks to himself, cause well, he likes to play boy games and not dress-up or house or dolls. The girls have a power struggle going on. Before we moved in, it was Girl A and Girl B. They played constantly. They did everything together. Then we came along. At first, Jill aligned herself with Girl A, but as time went along, Girl A started showing a different side. She can be quite mean. I have overheard things like, "You are stupid." And, "I am prettier than you." And so on and so forth. Also, Jill and Girl A are both leaders. The Boss. Must be in control. They eventually stopped playing together. Jill played more and more with Girl B. Girl B has been nothing but nice, and Jill and Girl B have become very close friends. From time to time Girl A and Girl B play together. Over the summer, we rarely saw Girl A, and it was not that apparent to Girl A how close Girl B and Jill had become. Then school started.
I watched Jill and Girl B link arms as they climbed onto the bus. Girl A, stood back watching. She was not happy. She felt left out. And it was Jill's fault. Apparently, there has been quite a bit of taunting and teasing on the bus by Girl A. She told the bus that Jill's dad did want her so she had to live with Kenny. She said that it wasn't Jill's choice not to play with her, it was because her mom said she was not allowed at our house. Not true, her mom actually asked me to watch her the other day. Today she told Jill that nobody liked Jill. Jill is not all that phased by it. She basically just asked if I would talk to the bus driver and have her seat switched. She doesn't want a big deal made. She simply does not want to be around the girl. I have taught her that people tend to attack you because of jealousy or hurt feelings. So Jill actually feels sorry for her. She understands that Girl A feels left out because Jill and Girl B are good friends now. However, I am not sure that simply asking the bus driver to allow Jill to sit in another seat is the right idea.
What I wonder is should I say something to the mom? I never know what to do in these situations. If they were four, I would step in. But these are second graders. Is it time to let them resolve it on their own?